Quiet

So I should really be studying for finals but I just finished a book that I couldn’t put down.  Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking.  It’s by Susan Cain and it is amazing.  She went to law school at Harvard but came to find that her true passion was psychology and writing.  It doesn’t matter whether you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert. This book is ridiculously insightful.  I think every parent, teacher, and therapist should read it.  Susan talks about how we live in a culture that truly values extroverted behavior.  We tend to think more highly of those who are outgoing, sociable, charismatic and quick to make decisions.  There is nothing wrong with these traits, except that we undervalue those who are more reserved, sensitive, and withdrawn.  Susan makes a powerful argument that the strengths of introverts are overlooked.

What Susan discusses is the quiet strength of those who hold back, self-reflect, and aren’t as quick to assert their opinion.  She makes compelling arguments in terms of stock market crashes that could have been avoided had the ‘introverts’ been in charge.  She cites studies indicating that brainstorming (face to face) amongst colleagues doesn’t necessarily help us generate intelligent decisions, but rather, group work helps us feel more validated and confident in our choices- whether or not they are the best ones.

 As she walks through the halls of the Harvard Business College Susan searches for introverts, but the students joke that she won’t find anyone who fits that description at HBC.  Professors make it their goal to facilitate conversation and group discussion.  They strategize about ways to make the quiet students speak up, correlating the volume of comments with academic success.  As a culture we value extroversion.  Our schools, churches, and businesses are modeled in ways to facilitate group interactions.  Some businesses have even done away with separated cubicles to enhance feelings of openness.  Unfortunately, creative thinkers generally need their personal space in order to reach some kind of flow.  I believe it was Microsoft that has now created a floor plan that allows for both privacy and group discussion when necessary. 

There is tons of amazing research in this book.  She doesn’t suggest that one way of being is better than the other, but rather that every voice has value.  One man argued that introverts don’t make effective leaders because he never hears what they have to say, but Susan would suggest otherwise.   She provides examples of Rosa Parks, Moses, Warren Buffett, Einstein and many more to showcase the strengths of the “quiet.”

I personally connected with this book and felt like I gained insight into my own personality.  Specifically as one who needs time to myself, and who is more than happy to stay home on a Friday or Saturday night with a good book.  At the end they talk about parents who are concerned for more socially withdrawn children, but suggest that rather than force that child into uncomfortable situations that they create outlets to cultivate their child’s natural strengths.  I also appreciated that she suggests people are not limited to certain careers based on their temperament.  There is so much I could say about this book and probably not a lot that will do it justice, but if you get the chance, don’t hesitate to read it.